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The Power of Giving

Published on 11/2/2023

Where the Heart Resides
THE POWER OF GIVING

By: Amanda Hyslop | November 2, 2023

Recently, while exploring my Waking Up Meditation App, I came across a fascinating idea that caught my attention - generativity. This term was introduced by the esteemed psychologist Erik Erikson. For those unfamiliar, Erik Erikson was a German-American developmental psychologist celebrated for his insights into the psychological development of human beings.

In Erikson's widely recognized theory, he presents a journey of eight distinct stages that every person travels through, from infancy to later years. Each stage is marked by a unique challenge that must be overcome to pave the way for healthy psychological and social development.

Navigating the nuances of adulthood, individuals often encounter what Erikson termed the seventh stage of development - Generativity versus Stagnation, a phase that can significantly shape one’s journey from around ages 40 to 65. It's the stage where people often shift from a “me, myself, and I” mindset to asking “how can I serve others?” and “what can I contribute to the world?” If individuals struggle to embrace a giving mindset, they might find themselves grappling with unsettled sensations like hitting a wall, feeling stuck, or even spiraling into a midlife crisis.

Now if you are a parent, you know the drill. Our entire day feels like a "generativity marathon." From the early morning scavenger hunt for the kids' shoes, to assembling lunchboxes, washing smelly gym clothes, and playing chauffeur to our teens who are desperately begging for a small rendezvous with friends. It's a mixed bag of joy, chaos, and "Are you kidding me?" moments. These things can easily be overlooked in the midst of our busy daily lives. Yet, Erikson emphasized the significant impact that acts of generativity can have. These efforts might slip through the crack of our chaotic lives unnoticed, but what we are doing is mastering the art of generativity.

Think of the time when you were teaching your child how to ride a bike, giving advice to a colleague at work, or bringing treats to your kid’s game – that’s generativity in action, baby! It might seem like the daily grind, yet those who have mastered the skill of generativity typically reap benefits such as better health, positive relationships, and greater feelings of satisfaction. Erikson believed these acts of giving back are the golden tickets to happiness.

Lindsay Rosoff, parent from MA, giving cupcakes to girl’s JV Volleyball team

I want to believe Erikson, especially when I am knee deep in my list of things to do for the family, volunteering for the PTA, or giving money to charity. Quick word on charity donations: because there is so much misinformation online, I use a tool called CharityWatch. It is an independent charity watchdog that allows you to run searches on the legitimacy and effectiveness of a given charity. It is also a great website if you want to learn more about how to suss out scams and identify charities that make a real impact.

From donating money, volunteering time, to sharing skills and offering emotional support, the spectrum of giving is vast and varied. Several iconic figures, celebrated for their contributions, have shared insights on both the tangible and intangible aspects of giving. St. Francis of Assisi professed, “For it is in giving, that we receive.” Pablo Picasso conveyed the sentiment, “The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away.” Maya Angelou, a literary giant, voiced her wisdom, “I have found that among its other benefits, giving liberates the soul of the giver.”

Using my nursing skills to volunteer with the Marin Medical Reserve Corps Vaccinating against Covid-19

These quotes resonate because they highlight instructions on a life well lived and illustrate how acts of giving have the ability to linger, inspire, and transform. My hope is that people can live and feel these words and that by giving of ourselves we step out of our shell and use our time to make this world a kinder place.

So, who’s on board? Share with me what you’re doing. Give me a shout in my inbox. I’ve got a kudos with your name written all over it.

Amanda Hyslop is rocking the mom life with two whip-smart kiddos, Sienna & William, and her hubby, Bill, who has a knack for dad jokes. By day, she's a go-to Advice Nurse at Tamalpais Pediatrics; by night, you'll find her playing the keys or hitting the pavement for a run. Amanda's all ears for your thoughts amandahyslop@gmail.com and will get back to you – just as soon as she locates that pesky missing sock!